Friday, September 17, 2004
THIS WEEK'S COLLEGE ANECDOTES
Oh the daughter is a delicious one... My morning email from college today:
Daughter: Good morning slut. Call me when you get into work
Love,
(your wonderful daughter)
Jxxxx
Me: I just tried to call you but you weren't there. You were obviously too busy sleeping around campus. Call me. Your adoring Mom.
Daughter: Well excuse me, i just tried you back but you are obviously already on your lunch break. I forgot that it was ALREADY almost eleven o'clock. Call me back when you can squeeze me into your 'hectic' work schedule.
Me: I was on the phone when you tried to call you ditz. I'll call you as soon as I'm done. You could probably get one more blow-job in if you hurry...
Oh don't be so shocked my readers. She is a straight-A kid with a good heart and very level-headed. OK and she has her mother's wicked sense of humor occasionally.
The son called the other night and asked immediately (and rather urgently) to speak to his father. 'Oh shit, now what?' I'm thinking to myself. Usually I am the go-to person for the catastrophe d'etat so I'm thinking this must be REALLY serious if he wants to talk to his dad. Reason for calling? Wanted to know how to prepare a good steak. Oh yes I've done a good job indeed. It wouldn't occur to him in a thousand years to ask his mother for cooking tips. Steaks? There have to be girls involved.
Oh the daughter is a delicious one... My morning email from college today:
Daughter: Good morning slut. Call me when you get into work
Love,
(your wonderful daughter)
Jxxxx
Me: I just tried to call you but you weren't there. You were obviously too busy sleeping around campus. Call me. Your adoring Mom.
Daughter: Well excuse me, i just tried you back but you are obviously already on your lunch break. I forgot that it was ALREADY almost eleven o'clock. Call me back when you can squeeze me into your 'hectic' work schedule.
Me: I was on the phone when you tried to call you ditz. I'll call you as soon as I'm done. You could probably get one more blow-job in if you hurry...
Oh don't be so shocked my readers. She is a straight-A kid with a good heart and very level-headed. OK and she has her mother's wicked sense of humor occasionally.
The son called the other night and asked immediately (and rather urgently) to speak to his father. 'Oh shit, now what?' I'm thinking to myself. Usually I am the go-to person for the catastrophe d'etat so I'm thinking this must be REALLY serious if he wants to talk to his dad. Reason for calling? Wanted to know how to prepare a good steak. Oh yes I've done a good job indeed. It wouldn't occur to him in a thousand years to ask his mother for cooking tips. Steaks? There have to be girls involved.
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